Get Ready for Love: Loving Yourself – Post 2

Posted by on Jun 21, 2015 in Blog, For Guys & Gals | 0 comments

Get Ready for Love: Loving Yourself – Post 2

Most people have wondered, at some point or another, whether they are “good enough.” This is partially a result of the many ways in which society indoctrinates us about who we are “supposed to be.” We wonder: “Am I smart enough? Successful enough? Handsome/pretty enough? Rich enough?” and so on. We compare ourselves to others – because that is what we are taught to do – and find ourselves lacking in some area – or many.

At core, this inner struggle is a fear of not being worthy of love. That is the ultimate fear. And out of this fear, and the hurt and rejection many if not most of us have experienced in life, we protect ourselves and “act out,” doing hurtful things to others, and to ourselves. It is a paradox: out of a fear of not being worthy of love – and trying to keep ourselves “safe” from getting hurt – we do things that drive away the very love we crave. Usually this happens completely unconsciously. Sometimes the hurt we impose upon ourselves, and on others, is severe. The week I write this, we see this in a young man who shot and killed nine people in a church in South Carolina….

But this doesn’t mean we should stop loving, or believing we, or any other human being, is not worthy of love. Whether we have hurt ourselves or others in our lives, we are all still worthy of love. How could it be otherwise? Human beings are brought into the world to love others and be loved. It is fundamental to our human nature. It is when people don’t get the love that is each person’s birthright, or are taught to hate others, that violence happens.

Of course, we still need to get ourselves out of harm’s way when someone is being destructive – and hold ourselves and others accountable for mental or physical violence or abuse. And ideally we would each do what we can to heal whatever damage we have done in the past, to ourselves and to others.

We might need to change to treat ourselves and others better – or to attract or keep the love we crave as part of the human condition.

However, the first step in loving yourself is acknowledging, as a principle, that EVERY person is worthy of love, no exceptions, including you. Can you do that?

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